A description of a party - by Aditi
Aditi, this is a fabulous piece of writing. You set yourself the target to write about 8-9 sentences in just 10 minutes, including your planning. You've achieved this goal! Well done for writing so well under this time constraint. Your idea is not a typical party - so, it's interesting for the reader. You spent a little time after writing checking your work for any errors (and spotted just a few). Using a thesaurus, you added a few, well-chosen powerful adjectives - such as 'ambrosial'. What a great job! Well done.
Last week was the best night of my life; I had gone to the first extravagant party ever announced after lock-down. The party’s name was ‘Festive Fun’. It was held in the immense ‘Grand Square’ by the town council to celebrate the battle against a pesky virus and its prey. The party had lights, cameras and a whole load of action. There was so much ambrosial cake that not even the whole town combined could eat it. After all this, there was an uplifting speech (a long speech) - a speech that felt like it was ten hours. Time passed and we all had a wonderful time. In the end, we all got a momentous gift from the NHS to thank us for all the support we had given them. The surprise was a monumental statue of those who had fought a tough battle, fulfilled their purpose in life and will be remembered for eternity.