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Children's writing: figurative language in a description - by Lucca

03.09.21

Thank you so much for sharing your writing, Lucca! In this description of a scene (picture below), you have used inspiring figurative language to help give us a narrative for the picture. You told me that you read a lot - and this is very apparent because your imagery is chosen and used effortlessly. This will really help other students to spot how figurative language can be used for a seemingly simple image. A huge well done, Lucca!


Here are examples of your excellent figurative language choices, typed text and the original hand-written version:


Personification

  • ‘.. the ocean embraced the rocks, giving them a warm, hearty hug',
  • ‘The sun shone brightly over the cyan-blue water, admiring its reflection.
  • ‘The parakeet-green vegetation growing over the cliffs danced as the ever-changing wind rustled their leaves.’
  • ‘In the far distance, the puffy, sheep-like clouds transformed into a menacing, flint-grey colour.’
  • ‘ … the ochre-red cliffs loomed over the harbour…’

 Similes

  • ‘Like soldiers standing to attention,.’
  • ‘… sheep-like clouds…’

 Metaphor

  • ‘…the sapphire-blue sky was turning into a monster.’
  • ‘The waves had made the change from playful children to serious adults.’
  • ‘The trees, the fishermen, anything except the waves were bowing down to their king: the storm.’

 Compound colours

  • cyan-blue
  • golden-yellow
  • ochre-red
  • sapphire-blue
  • parakeet-green
  • flint-grey

The Harbour, by Lucca G.

Gently, the graceful, elegant boat glided over the delicate water, as the ocean embraced the rocks, giving them a warm, hearty hug. The sun shone brightly over the cyan-blue water, admiring its reflection. As the clear, cobalt water lapped on the golden-yellow sand, the minuscule fish swam off to their aquamarine home. They knew that a storm was coming.

Like soldiers standing to attention, the ochre-red cliffs loomed over the harbour. The parakeet-green vegetation growing over the cliffs danced as the ever-changing wind rustled their leaves. As they realised what was happening, the fishermen pulled in their nets, which were scarce of fish. They, too, had realised a storm was coming.

In the far distance, the puffy, sheep-like clouds transformed into a menacing, flint-grey colour. The storm was coming, and the sapphire-blue sky was turning into a monster. The waves had made the change from playful children to serious adults. The calm, serene sea had turned into a raging monster, trying to attack the sky, and crashing into the shore. The fishermen were concerned. Worried. Scared. The trees, the fishermen, anything except the waves were bowing down to their king: the storm.